Lauren's Dream...

My daughter had a dream last December (I just found this, saved as a draft, and never published.)...

I was having a picnic with Connie and the Hexter kids at a small zoo. A man, the opposite of Jesus[False Messiah], was standing in front of the zoo telling everyone that if they wanted to get into the zoo they had to come talk to him. All the children go to him except the Hexters and me and Connie. He calls to us yelling "get over here". The Hexters try to get pass him with out saying anything. But the man hypnotizes them with a snake like stick with red eyes and a sharp point. All the children now have red eyes and are hypnotized.

A jail falls from the sky and now the whole zoo is in jail. I found some roller skates with bombs[rockets] on them and flew up to a cloud and hid behind it. I looked down and could see the jail[hell]. I rang hells doorbell and when the guard opened the door I sneaked in. I saw that everyone was being hypnotized with the wand and helmets. I popped the helmets off everyone and they aren't hypnotized anymore. I smashed a robot dog that had cameras all over it. I then saw a bright light and satan was there, and everyone was blind, he asked why I broke his dog. Then there was another bright light and God[Jesus] was there, and everyone could see again. Then there was a brighter light then all the others, I hid cause I was scared, but after that no one was blind[hypnotized] anymore. I looked up and saw Jesus and a frog[toad] and asked Jesus what the frog was. He said it was the False Messiah. Then the frog fell through the floor and you could hear it splat when it hit bottom. Then Jesus asked me to come to heaven with him. Then I was in Heaven.

This from the daughter who, while on our family vacation, bought a sling-shot and bow & arrows for souvenirs.

I have quite the Warrior Princess on my hands!!

Knighthood...

My wife's birthday was coming up and I was asking Father what I should do or give her to make it special. (It wasn't a big year like 35 or 40 or anything that we usually make a big deal about, just thirty something. But I wanted to make it special anyway.) When He says,

"Knight her."

Ha ha, uh what? How do you knight a woman? That, that's a guy thing.

"Think about it, you'll figure it out." He said.

So I thought. After a few days I was thinking of the final battle in Lord of the Rings when Eowyn slayed the witch king, when Father shows up...and revealed Sandy’s part in His story and how it fits with my part in His story...

"Remember when you were preparing for the Boot Camp this past spring and were being attacked by the enemy? Remember Sandy showing up and fighting for you in that? Remember when you were struggling with questions of work and how she showed up and pointed out that you are a warrior made for battle, and this is just a time between battles? How that - like Eowyn who stood between the Nazgul and her uncle - Sandy bears her weapons well in the battle? She is a Shieldmaiden in my Kingdom, beautiful and strong in Heart."

-------------------------

At dawn on March 15, the Rohirrim rode into battle on the Pelennor Fields. Eowyn left her place in Elfhelm's eored and rode with the King's company, remaining near Theoden through the charge. Suddenly the Witch-king of Angmar, Lord of the Nazgul, descended onto the field mounted on a Fell Beast. Windfola threw Eowyn and Merry in terror. When she saw that Theoden had been crushed under his own horse, Eowyn wept for she had loved him like a father and she confronted the Witch-king.

"Begone, foul dwimmerlaik, lord of carrion! Leave the dead in peace!"

A cold voice answered: "Come not between the Nazgul and his prey! Or he will not slay thee in thy turn. He will bear thee away to the houses of lamentation, beyond all darkness, where thy flesh shall be devoured, and thy shrivelled mind be left naked to the Lidless Eye."

A sword rang as it was drawn. "Do what you will; but I will hinder it, if I may."

"Hinder me? Thou fool. No living man may hinder me!"

Then Merry heard of all sounds in that hour the strangest. It seemed that Dernhelm laughed, and the clear voice was like the ring of steel. "But no living man am I! You look upon a woman. Eowyn I am, Eomund's daughter. You stand between me and my
lord and kin. Begone, if you be not deathless! For living or dark undead, I will smite you, if you touch him." The Return of the King: "The Battle of the Pelennor Fields," p. 116

The Fell Beast shrieked and struck at her, but Eowyn stood her ground and she beheaded the evil creature with one swift and skillful stroke. The Witch-king shattered her shield and her shield-arm with his mace and she fell to her knees. The Witch-king prepared to deliver the death blow, but then Merry pierced the sinew of the his knee with his sword of Westernesse, causing the Witch-king to stumble.

Eowyn summoned her strength and thrust her sword into the space between his crown and mantle, and the Witch-king was vanquished. His robes fell empty to the ground and his spirit passed away with a shrill wail. Thus it was that Eowyn fulfilled a 1,000-year-old prophecy spoken by the Elf-lord Glorfindel that the Witch-king would not fall by the hand of man.

-------------------------

So I gave a little speach at her party and ended it like so...

For Years Sandy has fought hard for the hearts of her family. Especially mine.

She has taken up sword and shield often in the last 2 years as I have found my heart, and starting fighting for the hearts of other men. She has been a powerful ally against our enemy in the battle for God’s kingdom.

I just cannot think of going to battle without her at my side.

So as an Honor to her and a witness to all who came to her party, I presented her with a symbol of her Spiritual bravery, strength and wisdom. A replica of Eowyn's sword.




It was awesome, Sandy was really blessed. People were teary eyed. And men were bummed that I raised the bar so high for them :). And Sandy was reeeeally blessed!

Not many men can give their wife a sword for her birthday and pull it off - But I nailed it!

a trustable heart

Last weekend I got together with a few Allies for a Guys Night Out. We had a great time. Since it is between Thanksgiving and Christmas, I was greatly looking forward to it. If you are anything like me; I get overwhelmed with all the estrogen, religious baggage, commercialism of the holidays,

It was a good time. I enjoyed getting to know Phillip more. Hearing how the father has been working in his heart. As well as getting to share and listen to everyone's else heart. We watched a great movie. Spent the night. It truly was a good time.

Leaving in the morning I felt a little - unmet. It seems I had an expectation for God to show up in a way that he didn't, if that makes sense.

Not too long into the hour plus drive home, as I was listening to a CD Phillip gave me, God showed up.

It went a little something like this...

As I was listening to Phillips music, I wished that I was able to write things like songs and poetry, or anything eloquently for that matter.

I thought of a song that had a line something like "In my father's house" (not that one about the many rooms). Then it faded to more like "In my Father's arms". That's when God showed up.

I saw in that moment and every moment, before and after, I was in my Father's arms.

   "Rocco, do you trust Me?" God asked.
   "Uh, yes." I answered. (Almost asking myself.)
   "Do I give good gifts?" God Asked.
   "Yes." I answered.
   "Do you trust my heart?" He asked.
   "Yes."
   "Did I give you a new heart?"
   "Yes."
   "Would I give you a bad heart?"
   "No."
   "Then your heart is good."
   "Yeah."
   "If you trust My heart, you can trust your heart." God proclaimed.
   "So this doesn't have anything to do with poetry or music, does it? How do I 'not trust my heart'?"
   "You relinquish your authority. You let others make decisions for you."
   "But, that's cause I am trying to be nice."
   "No. You don't trust your heart. I have given you your heart, the desires of your heart, not for your benefit alone, but for all those in your life. They will miss out on great things if you don't trust your heart."

That's when the tears started flowing. I cried the rest of the way home pondering that. He was right. I let others make decisions based on the fact I don't trust my own heart. I believed my judgments and wisdom was not as good as others'.

What really sealed the deal for me was late that night as my family sat in the living room, Sandy my wife was reading the final chapter of The Silver Chair by C. S. Lewis, the adventure is over and Good has prevailed. As Eustace and Jill prepare to return home, Caspian, who is now a young man again (cause they are in Heaven) asked to see their world...

   "Oh," said Caspian. "I see what's bothering you. You think I'm a ghost, or some nonsense. But don't you see? I would be if I appeared in Narnia now: because I don't belong there anymore.But one can't be a ghost in one's own country. I might be a ghost if I got into your world. I don't know. But I suppose it isn't yours either, now your here."
   A great hope rose in the children's hearts. But Aslan shook his shaggy head. "No, my dears," he said. "When you meet me here again, you will have come to stay. But not now. You must go back to your own world for a while."
   "Sir," said Caspian, "I've always wanted to have just one glimpse of their world. Is that wrong?"
   "You cannot want wrong things any more, now that you have died, my son," said Aslan.

God was sitting there, looking out of the corner of His eye at me, a gentle, slight smile on His face.

Lie identified, Agreement broken.

Rohon!

It's about the Heart.

I have a very personal testimony concerning alcoholism, and the freedom God has brought to me in that area. You see, my dad is an alcoholic, he has been so my whole life. I have only known two short moments of my life when he was sober. My dad was very abusive verbally. And even though he and my mom never divorced, he was never a 'presence' in my life (or my brothers). At some point in my young life I determined to never drink. "It was evil and brought great pain to people", "I will never let it control my life". The problem is, it Did control my life. Even though I didn't drink, I was in bondage the same as my dad.

One day a few years ago, even before I read any of John E's books, God showed me that alcohol itself was not evil. Now I didn't run off to get drunk, But I had a peace like never before when it concerned alcohol.

As I started to read John's books God again came and Fathered me in this area. When you see and believe the fact that we have an enemy who is out to steal, kill, and destroy our lives, you see what the true evil is, satan. He stops at nothing to wound us and lie to us in order to get us to fall for lesser lovers. My dad did so to alcohol. Many people take their question / heart to the wrong source - "Do I have what it takes? Do I have something to offer? Am I loved? Do people like me? Am I really a Man/Woman? Etc....". The question then gets answered incorrectly or not at all, and satan is right their to seduce us to lesser lovers; alcohol, porn, food, drugs, sports, people, religion. Those things can only temporarily bring an answer, thus is born our addiction/slavery to it.

It all boils down to who or what we are taking our heart to? Unless we take it to God, we will live a miserable life. The lesser lovers will never fully 'complete' us. They are designed not to. Over eating a snickers is just as much a sin is over drinking alcohol. How many verses are there about being a glutton? Yet, look at our society (the US). We have more over weight people then we do drunkards, but being over weight is OK for some reason? At least you won't get openly judged like those who occasionally drink.

My whole life I avoided alcohol, but it was bondage all the same. I live in freedom now, not freedom to live a life of a drunkard, but freedom to have a beer or drink once in a while, and enjoy it.

A lot of former friends gasped at the fact that I will drink a beer considering my childhood, "How can you drink when your dad is an alcoholic?!? You've suffered so much pain!?", I've been asked more then once. My response? I point out the fact that one of my grandfathers molested children, should I then not have sex, or children even?

Where is your heart? Are you taking your need for Life = (Love, Acceptance, Affirmation, Validation, Identity, The deep needs of your heart, Etc.) to the Father? Or to food, drink, toys, games, cars, careers, women, sports, Religion etc.?

What is your relationship to God? I hope you are not living a life of duty, or religious obligation. I hope you are living in the Father's love, in love with him. I hope you are taking your heart to Him. Walking with Him, in the garden, holding hands, talking, laughing, being loved by Him, and loving Him. That's His desire, that's why He made us, that's what He longs for still.

The past few weeks God has been fathering me to fight for my dad's heart. Trust me when I say the thought of that is not easy! God is showing me that I have something to offer my dad, not as his son, but as a son of God. At some point before I was born my dad's heart was wounded, and satan seduced him to a lesser Lover (alcohol). The fight is not to show him how alcohol is a sin and how he needs to repent and ask for forgiveness. The fight will be for him to see God as his true love, the One who is pursuing him, Who delights in him as His son, His beloved.

It's about the Heart.

I am looking forward to the day of the Lord's return, when we will feast with him...

Isaiah 25:6 (NIV)
6 On this mountain the LORD Almighty will prepare
a feast of rich food for all peoples,
a banquet of aged wine—
the best of meats and the finest of wines.

...