Sunday, November 30, 2008

It's about the Heart.

I have a very personal testimony concerning alcoholism, and the freedom God has brought to me in that area. You see, my dad is an alcoholic, he has been so my whole life. I have only known two short moments of my life when he was sober. My dad was very abusive verbally. And even though he and my mom never divorced, he was never a 'presence' in my life (or my brothers). At some point in my young life I determined to never drink. "It was evil and brought great pain to people", "I will never let it control my life". The problem is, it Did control my life. Even though I didn't drink, I was in bondage the same as my dad.

One day a few years ago, even before I read any of John E's books, God showed me that alcohol itself was not evil. Now I didn't run off to get drunk, But I had a peace like never before when it concerned alcohol.

As I started to read John's books God again came and Fathered me in this area. When you see and believe the fact that we have an enemy who is out to steal, kill, and destroy our lives, you see what the true evil is, satan. He stops at nothing to wound us and lie to us in order to get us to fall for lesser lovers. My dad did so to alcohol. Many people take their question / heart to the wrong source - "Do I have what it takes? Do I have something to offer? Am I loved? Do people like me? Am I really a Man/Woman? Etc....". The question then gets answered incorrectly or not at all, and satan is right their to seduce us to lesser lovers; alcohol, porn, food, drugs, sports, people, religion. Those things can only temporarily bring an answer, thus is born our addiction/slavery to it.

It all boils down to who or what we are taking our heart to? Unless we take it to God, we will live a miserable life. The lesser lovers will never fully 'complete' us. They are designed not to. Over eating a snickers is just as much a sin is over drinking alcohol. How many verses are there about being a glutton? Yet, look at our society (the US). We have more over weight people then we do drunkards, but being over weight is OK for some reason? At least you won't get openly judged like those who occasionally drink.

My whole life I avoided alcohol, but it was bondage all the same. I live in freedom now, not freedom to live a life of a drunkard, but freedom to have a beer or drink once in a while, and enjoy it.

A lot of former friends gasped at the fact that I will drink a beer considering my childhood, "How can you drink when your dad is an alcoholic?!? You've suffered so much pain!?", I've been asked more then once. My response? I point out the fact that one of my grandfathers molested children, should I then not have sex, or children even?

Where is your heart? Are you taking your need for Life = (Love, Acceptance, Affirmation, Validation, Identity, The deep needs of your heart, Etc.) to the Father? Or to food, drink, toys, games, cars, careers, women, sports, Religion etc.?

What is your relationship to God? I hope you are not living a life of duty, or religious obligation. I hope you are living in the Father's love, in love with him. I hope you are taking your heart to Him. Walking with Him, in the garden, holding hands, talking, laughing, being loved by Him, and loving Him. That's His desire, that's why He made us, that's what He longs for still.

The past few weeks God has been fathering me to fight for my dad's heart. Trust me when I say the thought of that is not easy! God is showing me that I have something to offer my dad, not as his son, but as a son of God. At some point before I was born my dad's heart was wounded, and satan seduced him to a lesser Lover (alcohol). The fight is not to show him how alcohol is a sin and how he needs to repent and ask for forgiveness. The fight will be for him to see God as his true love, the One who is pursuing him, Who delights in him as His son, His beloved.

It's about the Heart.


I am looking forward to the day of the Lord's return, when we will feast with him...

Isaiah 25:6 (NIV)
6 On this mountain the LORD Almighty will prepare
a feast of rich food for all peoples,
a banquet of aged wine
the best of meats and the finest of wines.

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